My favorite client is straddling that very fine line between here in this world and whatever lies beyond. At this point, I don't even know what I believe lies beyond. She seems so scared of whatever "visits" her in her room. Yet, other times, she seems at peace, content, and blissfully unaware of her current situation. So what awaits her in the end? Fear? Bliss? I just feel completely helpless when it comes to comforting her...i am doing the best that I can but, is it enough? Does it make any difference at all?
Then when coming home from an emotionally draining day, I get to come home to my sister who is on leave and visiting until saturday. As far as i am concerned, I am relieved that she will be leaving saturday. Last night she crossed what I would call the ultimate sister/girl code no no line. She fucked my fuck buddy...really?! Who does that?! He came over to see me, comfort me after a long day, and then she digs her claws in and turns it all on her. Fine, she needs the attention more than me. Did she really need to take it that far though?! And what the hell was he thinking?!?!?! He is kissing me on second then has his hand down her pants the next??? ALL WHILE IN MY HOUSE WHILE I A LAYING BESIDE THEM!!! Then I politely, yet, obviously excuse myself to bed so that i don't have to watch this surreal car wreck of an activity in front of me....and they get loud! for what? my benefit? Let me clue you in...that will lead to physical harm on your behalf if you continue and take away from my sleep!!!
I am far too emotional to even sort out my thoughts anymore....I will jump online and write my invisible, imaginary audience again later.
Thanks for reading my tale of woe...
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